This was a ten.
For a while I haven’t had a flare of a ten.That level of pain that makes you feel like vomiting. I just survived one. It was horrible and scary and I had no idea what am I supposed to do.
I was home alone with dad and I know he can’t do anything about it. I refused to call my sisters or anyone and make them worry. So I texted Tony,the only person that’s been there since the beginning of this whole thing because I felt like I’m about to pass out or my head was about to burst and I needed to tell someone in case something happens, it was serious and what worried me the most I haven’t been exhausting myself with anything to have this. It happened this morning and it happened again two hours ago. Luckily my sister came home right on time and someone’s presence was enough to calm me down.
I don’t even want to remember how awful it felt or how for a second there I thought it was the end. All I could think of was why is this happening to me? what did I do to deserve this? and what freaked me out the most is the dark future I’m seeing before my eyes; I’m only getting worse.
I feel so much better now as I write this, my back is still stiff and the sharp pain in my knee is still there but I’m better and I came out with a confirmation; Everything is temporary. I got myself together and I survived.